New blog name...same girl chatting...

So yes, I changed the name of my blog because well, frankly, I am tired of some things and I just want a place where I can be real.

The big news??

I am pregnant. Yep...you heard it here first. I am 9 weeks pregnant and my whole life has been turned upside down and every time I express my worry, concern, discomfort and so on ...on any of those mommy to be forums, I get internet bashed. 

We are talking a full out flame war because I am stressed, sick, worried and not just over come with joy that I am pregnant.

Of course I would not be saying anything about this if I had any plans on not following through with it. I also have been keeping my mouth shut (except for reaching out online for support from strangers) because I was pregnant last year and there was a loss. 

But tonight...I am tired, my boobs hurt more than anything I ever thought could, I had to stop ALL MY MEDS cold turkey (because duh..I was not trying to get pregnant) and I just want to complain sometimes. 

I am not feeling the joy of pregnancy. I spend all day sick to my stomach and tired, I can not take sleeping pills and I have injuries in my back and neck that can no longer be handled with meds or even be investigated further due to what they would need to do.

I know this gets better.....but where are the REAL pregnant women out there?? Where are the women who got pregnant by accident and who were not quite ready but are taking on the challenge? Where are those who are not thinking this is the greatest thing in their lives ever? Who are sick and tired of being sick and tired??

Only a few people read this...and maybe not even that but it is at least a place where if someone does find it, they can be honest in their reply and maybe say what is making them crazy too. Talk about all the stuff that is hard about being pregnant, working, in a still new-ish relationship and so on.


On another note...my friend died today. She had breast cancer and I did not even get to tell her I was pregnant. I did not get to see her in her new home in Atlanta...we were planning a cruise for next year ...I did not think that my last conversation with her would truly have been my last. 

Maybe that was the motivation to change this blog over to a real life rant...but I realize that I do not have time to sit and worry and feel judged on other internet sites. Forget those sites....I do not need them. 

All I need are the people that love me, support me and want to be a part of all this ever changing stuff. 

So if that is you...stay tuned.