Parenting scares...bad reality TV and more.

Being a parent. That STILL has not quite hit me all the way. Someone is going to rely on me to raise them, teach them and prepare them for life.

I am not strict religious but more spiritual and the father is an atheist. We have been talking about things that will/will not be important to us but also how to let the child feel "normal" in some ways with their school friends and what not.

We do not want to lie to the kid. Meaning, we do not want to do things like the tooth fairy, Easter bunny or Santa. Yes...I said Santa. We are not going to teach the whole man in a red outfit coming in the house kinda thing. I was thinking more along the lines of teaching about Saint Nick and the good work he did when he was alive along with the Pegan (sp?) things such as the symbol of the tree and what not. 

The same goes for Easter, teaching the spring festival instead of the religious points of Easter. Of course the sexual things of the spring festival will wait until this person is much older, but you know what I mean. 

Will that make my kid a bit of an outsider?? Maybe. I will also have to find a way to teach them not to ruin Christmas or other traditions for the kids who are taught to believe because I do not want to ruin anyone elses parenting styles...this is just what I think will work for us. 

....so what has me thinking about all this parenting stuff?? I have been very very very very very ill with my morning sickness. Missed 4 days of work now...with only daytime reality type TV shows to keep me company and I started watching the TLC program, Sister Wives.

This is about a polygamist family in Utah who basically went public with their lifestyle. I am enjoying seeing the dynamic. I have always been a believer in it takes a village to raise a child and that other adult and child influences on the child are very valuable but at the same time, they are talking about how people judge and are afraid of what they do not understand but they are not addressing the things that cause these issues to begin with.

If they want us to understand them better ...they also need to talk about the bad that is out there in their religion. Those extreme members with the compounds and the child brides. So far (I am on season 2, episode 8) they have not addressed this at all.

I think that if they were more open about the negative stuff...meaning acknowledging it and addressing concerns, that more people would give them less crap about their lifestyle. 

From what I can see, this family works. Does it work for me?? No way. Unprotected sex with 3 other women and making babies with those women, no way. I am WAY too jealous for that. I would love to have land with houses and all my friends and close family around to share in raising each others kids and things like that...but sharing the man himself, no way. Not for me. 

Honestly, I like all the women except one; Robyn. She bothers me for some reason...maybe because she is new and she does not seem to have the same dynamic that the original 3 wives had but I am not sure.

What I do like is that he was married to the original 3 BEFORE any children were born and I would probably like the show more if it had stayed that way. When you have your lifestyle established and THEN bring children into it, I think it is much healthier but again, it is not really my place to judge...but I will judge anyway. It is what humans do.

As for the MORE part of my subject line...I can not reply to comments on my own blog!! Does anyone know why that is?? It says I am not authorized to comment!! I can not figure this out. Some of you who read me are professionals at this, so maybe you can offer me some advice but to reply to Dani... 

I am due in late May or early June. Anywhere from May 25th to June 3rd. I actually like having such a wide range because it lets me feel like I can relax without a DEADLINE. It will kinda happen when it happens...and I like that.

What is interesting is I will be turning 30 on May 27th..so no matter when it comes, it will be so close to my birthday! 

Let us see now if I can keep some food in me this afternoon! 

New blog name...same girl chatting...

So yes, I changed the name of my blog because well, frankly, I am tired of some things and I just want a place where I can be real.

The big news??

I am pregnant. Yep...you heard it here first. I am 9 weeks pregnant and my whole life has been turned upside down and every time I express my worry, concern, discomfort and so on ...on any of those mommy to be forums, I get internet bashed. 

We are talking a full out flame war because I am stressed, sick, worried and not just over come with joy that I am pregnant.

Of course I would not be saying anything about this if I had any plans on not following through with it. I also have been keeping my mouth shut (except for reaching out online for support from strangers) because I was pregnant last year and there was a loss. 

But tonight...I am tired, my boobs hurt more than anything I ever thought could, I had to stop ALL MY MEDS cold turkey (because duh..I was not trying to get pregnant) and I just want to complain sometimes. 

I am not feeling the joy of pregnancy. I spend all day sick to my stomach and tired, I can not take sleeping pills and I have injuries in my back and neck that can no longer be handled with meds or even be investigated further due to what they would need to do.

I know this gets better.....but where are the REAL pregnant women out there?? Where are the women who got pregnant by accident and who were not quite ready but are taking on the challenge? Where are those who are not thinking this is the greatest thing in their lives ever? Who are sick and tired of being sick and tired??

Only a few people read this...and maybe not even that but it is at least a place where if someone does find it, they can be honest in their reply and maybe say what is making them crazy too. Talk about all the stuff that is hard about being pregnant, working, in a still new-ish relationship and so on.


On another note...my friend died today. She had breast cancer and I did not even get to tell her I was pregnant. I did not get to see her in her new home in Atlanta...we were planning a cruise for next year ...I did not think that my last conversation with her would truly have been my last. 

Maybe that was the motivation to change this blog over to a real life rant...but I realize that I do not have time to sit and worry and feel judged on other internet sites. Forget those sites....I do not need them. 

All I need are the people that love me, support me and want to be a part of all this ever changing stuff. 

So if that is you...stay tuned.